This is my mommy wish list for Christmas 2010.
First and for most, I would love a clean house, not immaculate, although that would be nice too.
If you could, please provide my six year old boy with a chill pill or two ; he’s driving me nuts with his bipolar behavior…why do six year olds get so crazy, silly, all over the place one minute, and then in the next minute, they are in utter tears??? Can you riddle me that Santa!!
Second on my list…I would like you to take my eight year old daughter’s “tude” down a few notches. If I see her one more time, shift her stance to one side putting a hand on her hip while the other hand is waving in the air with its index finger pointed as she says to me “Why would I want to do that?” I’m going to start spitting fire at her!!!
Next on the list has to do with the man of my house formerly known as “Mr. Wonderful”. Yes eight years ago he was “Mr. Wonderful” to me and now he is simply known as “Mr. What the Hell?” I find myself constantly asking …”What the hell did you do that for?” or “What the hell was going thru your mind?” or “Can you tell me what the hell you are doing now???” Santa, I would really like old “Mr. Wonderful” back…any chances of that happening this year?
My last big wish for the impossible Santa has to do with our dog Buster. Strap, glue, wire or whatever else you can use to keep him from chomping down on my shoes, phones, house, cameras, children, automobile and so on. You name it, he’s chewed it and it needs to stop NOW!!!!
I have been a very good mommy this year…no one has lost any appendages, no one has fallen out a window, no one has been run over by my car, and no one has been given any tainted food or drink. So please Santa, if you truly exist, I beg of you to grant me at least one of my wishes this year for Christmas.
PS…in return for one granted wish I will gladly donate 10-15 of my own pounds to your most worthy cause!!!