One of the things I have always wanted to do is to paint a picture.
I have no real experience outside of my 10th grade high school art class of which I was not one of my art teacher’s favorite students. I suppose I felt that he wrote me off as possessing zero potential…and I let that frustrate me. It frustrated me so much that I decided art was not for me and that I must have been delusional to think I had any talent at all! It wasn’t until I was a sophomore in college that I took art again…I figured it would be a relatively easy “C” for me. Much to my surprise I pulled an “A” out of the class. I still didn’t believe that I had any real talent so I decided not to peruse it anymore…thinking of it as a colossal waste of my time.
I did a few more charcoal drawings in my 20’s but then I put it all down for good as I started to strike out and make my own way in the world.
Now I will be 49 in a couple of days and I have decided to revisit the notion of producing something in the name of art! My question to myself is why…why did it take so long for me to start thinking about this again? And the only answer I have is that now I find more meaning in the effort to create…it satisfies a huge part of “my being” that I had consciously and sadly enough, made the decision to dismiss all those years ago.